Be Careful What You Say

People like to talk.  About anything and usually anyone.  I know.  I am a people.  But as I have gotten older and witnessed many tragedies and triumphs in people's lives I have realized that you have to be careful.  Everyone has a story and it is just that..........THEIR story.  Not yours.  Not for you to pass along, not for you to ponder about with someone else, and not for you to even really give your opinion.  Some things are personal and private yet those are the things we want to talk about the most.  Why is that?  So we can say we "know", or we "knew first", or perhaps by speaking them it somehow makes us a part of the story whether it be good or bad.  I have been guilty of telling people's story without permission.  I have been guilty of pondering about it with others.  I have been guilty.  And I am ashamed.  Ashamed that I didn't realize that none of that was helping and many times was just making things worse.  I get that people care and they are concerned but even good intentions can do harm. 
We have had a rash of tragedies in our community in the past year and social media tends to fill up with people sounding the alarm.  A sort of FB Paul Revere if you will.  Did you hear?  Who knows what happened?  Or, worse, they put information out there that is totally unsubstantiated.  But these stories involve real people just like those that are putting it "out there."  Why? 
I remember an old song that said "silence is golden, but my eyes still see."  Just because you see it does that mean you are required to declare it?  I think not.
And if people choose to share their story and put it out there...that's different. But let THEM do it. Nothing is sacred anymore.  Everyone knows everything about everyone.
If someone has a trial or a triumph I think it is up to them as to whether they want it on social media. Or in other people's conversations or even on their lips for that matter.  And I know that everyone, myself included, gossip to some extent.  EVERYONE! Not easy to admit but it is the truth.  And to be concerned or to try to "help" a situation is not that.  But I am just amazed at the people that pride themselves on being "in the know" as if it somehow makes them better? I have changed my perspective on things in the last few months and I want to say I am sorry that I have ever told, speculated, or spread someone else's story.  And even though I never really felt like I was doing harm, it was wrong.  It's always wrong.  Hard to accept but that is the truth of the matter.  It's gossip no matter how you view it.
So, in the future, if you feel the need to tell a story that isn't yours...........think twice.......because some day it might be your story and how would you feel about someone else telling it?  Something to think about.  Just sayin.