When you hear that statement you almost always assume that someone has passed away. Well when someone close to you is no longer a part of your life it feels like a death sometimes. I have always been blessed with many friends and quite a few GOOD, CLOSE, DEPENDABLE, NO MATTER HOW MUCH TIME PASSES I WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU friends. I lost one today. And they don't even know it. I think a great deal of responsibility comes with being someone's friend. Unlike being an acquaintance, whom you smile or wave at, or engage in small talk with, a FRIEND is someone much more. You can always be honest with them and they with you no matter how painful the subject is. You might not agree but you aree to disagree and the relationship continues. Friendship is a gift from God. Our Lord was the friendliest human on earth and extended His precious hand of friendship to people of both sexes, from every financial class, and from all walks of life. He knew how important it was. Man doesn't do well alone and for those who don't have spouses or families, God created friends to stand in the gap. I take my friendships very seriously. Today, I have decided to end one. It is not something that I did lightly nor is it something they will probably ever realize. Because you see, I was their friend and would KNOW right away if something was wrong or if they felt differently about me. But perhaps they were never really mine. They could just not continue to do the same thing over and over that they KNOW is hurtful to me if they were truly my friend. Or at least they would talk to me about it and try to make me understand. Or perhaps just say, even though we don't agree on this, I want you to know that I care about you and am sorry if you are upset. Instead...........NOTHING. So, today as the reality of our TRUE relationship settled in on me, I said out loud (because for me, that makes it seem more viable when you vocalize your feelings)"I am no longer so and so's friend." And I feel sad about it.........and they probably won't even notice. I lost a friend today........they did not. Because now I have to painfully admit that they were never as invested in me as I was in them. Therefore they were never a TRUE friend after all. And with that being the case I should not feel so sad. Sigh............
I'm sorry Joyce. I too this past school year have "lost" a friend. The beauty of it was because of that loss it opened the door to many friends that we call the "lunch bunch" for me. However, it is a healing process. I felt silly for being upset over it, but realized it's a loss so it's okay to be down about it. Hope you get to feeling better.
ReplyDeleteI said good bye to a "friend" last summer just like you did, and I WAS the only one in the relationship who knew. My ex-friend still doesn't realize. Letting go of that one-sided friend opened the door to MANY more (& better) friends, so I hope by letting go of your one-sided friend you too find many more & better friends.
ReplyDeleteI too have experienced that loss. The hardest part for me is having so few friends that I can call on to share my hurts, frustrations, accomplishments and successes. It is difficult when you have to come to the realization that the one you have called friend closes the door and shuts you out. Or even worse, assumes the worst of you without ever giving you a chance. I guess if your friend is truly a friend, they will know you are missing from their life and feel the emptiness just like you do.
ReplyDeleteI hope it wasn't me!!
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